So a friend of mine is in Texas taking care of his mom who has been diagnosed with leukemia. He and his wife live right down the road from us, and we’ve been watching their house and cats while they are away. Well… he is in the same industry I’m in, and he left his laptop at home and called to ask me to ship it out to him. I was on my way to Santa Monica first thing in the morning, so there was no way I was going to be able to send it out unless it went out tonight. Kinkos is owned by FedEx now, so at about 12am, I found myself with an Apple Powerbook neatly tucked under my arm in the original shipping packaging it arrived in. Did I mention that I had the original box? Did I also mention how long it took me to find it at my buddy’s house? Keep this little tid-bit in mind for later in the story.

Kinkos at 12am is still a pretty happening place. I live in a college town, and there is a great graphic design curriculum at the nearby university… so late at night, it’s not uncommon to see students at Kinkos with last minute projects, bleary eyed and complaining about something called ‘registration’. Tonight was no exception.

I took my time writing out the labels… to… from… checking the boxes… signing my name… After more than 12 years worth in computer work, my handwriting is worse than the most fastidious of doctor, so my wife almost always writes anything for me if there is a potential of someone else needing to read it at any point in the future. Unfortunately, she was not there, so I made sure to take it slow so that at least the pharmacist could read it should it arrive at his front porch instead of my friend’s. I taped up the box, and waited in line. Did I mention that the box was the original packing material that the laptop arrived in at my buddy’s house when he bought it? Did I mention that it took almost 45 minutes for me to find it in his house?

After waiting another 20 minutes or so for the clerk to take care of the other folks there, It was finally my moment of glory. I plunked the box (the original shipping box from Apple) all neatly taped and labeled on the counter and let him know I needed to send it out. The guy behind the counter was actually pretty cool… nice guy… probably hates working nights, but I’m sure it beats working for Burger King. He started to ring me up, even took my card… and then asked… ‘do you need insurance?’… Now, the laptop isn’t really worth a whole lot… it’s an older model, worth maybe about $500… but I figured I’d call my buddy and find out if he needed it insured. In the meantime, the clerk hands me a small red card with black lettering (which i think the registration was off, come to think of it) … with a phone number on it and some guy’s name. I looked at him the way my dog looks at me when I open the jar of peanut butter… as if to beg for an answer, to which he replied… ‘FedEx does not offer insurance, you need to call these guys if you want to insure it.’ Great.

The first phone call to my buddy went unanswered… got his voicemail. Second call, same result. Called his wife… got voicemail again. Of course they wouldn’t be awake at 1am! Only I’m stupid enough to be up at 1am sending a laptop via Kinkos! After failing to reach my slumbering buddy and his wife, I figured I would make an executive decision for them and just get the insurance. I called the number on the red card with black lettering, and got voicemail… only open between the hours of butt crack of dawn and time for dinner. No insurance for you!

Well… now It was approaching 1:30am, and I had been at this process of sending out this stupid laptop now for more than 2 hours. I still had to pack for my trip to California early in the morning!

Whatever… I’ll just declare a value for the thing, and if something goes wrong, hopefully his homeowners will cover it.

The clerk continues to ring me up, weighs the package… and then asks… ‘is this a laptop?’ uh oh…

Apparently FedEx has this rule about the type of box you can ship a laptop in. You guessed it… it needs to be a FedEx approved box with a bunch of foam inside. $12. Did I mention that the box I had was the original packaging that Apple sent the laptop in?

So the shipping was $7 … but the container was $12… and FedEx would not insure it themselves … even with the special $12 box. Wonderful.